Colton's Birth Story

I am pretty slow getting around to this but I think its about time I sit down and write about one of the most amazing days of my life.  The day my son was born...

I was about 38 weeks along and my midwife told me she was pretty sure I was not going to go past my due date of March 8th.  I was planning for an early delivery for this boy because I was also planning Jeremy's surprise 30th birthday at the time.  His party was set for the 22nd so I was really pressed for recovery time before  his party but I thought there was no way I would go past my due date this time since I was doing ALL of those labor inducing activities... special tea, leg/foot massage, pressure points, yoga ball exercises, spicy foods, driving on bumpy roads, and of course walking...lots of walking.  You name it I tried it. I was determined to go into labor on my own instead of being induced, like I was with Hadley.  I went into my midwife with a hopeful heart on March 24th (I think) but I was only at a whopping 3.  I was happy my body was dilating at all since it did not with Hadley but seriously a THREE, I was not ok with this information.  I had the midwife strip my membranes the following week hoping that would move things along.  I was getting really stressed out about the surprise party and lets face it I make HUGE babies so I knew he was not getting any smaller in there.  I continued my labor activities but now I was was not so sure they were doing any good.

My Due date came and went and I was starting to believe I was going to have to be induced again and I was VERY unhappy about that.  I had another Dr. appt on March 10th.  I went in to the Dr. office with a hopeful heart that I would be making great progress.  I was day dreaming they would tell me to go straight to the hospital to check in.  The midwife checked me and while she was checking me I was thinking "this has to be it, I bet I am at a 7 and I am going straight to the hospital to get this baby out". Then midwife then told me I was at a 4.  Sigh.  A flipping 4 I was so frustrated at my body.  I felt like screaming at my body "why will you not dilate!!!"   I had her strip my membranes again.  She kept telling me everything looked great and she felt like she might see me in the hospital that night.  I was appreciative she was trying to keep my hopes up but I only had 6 more days before they were going to induce me and it just did not seem likely my body was going to do this on its own.  I again went home with a heavy heart but since my time was running short and this surprise party was quickly approaching I knew I had to keep trying to get this kid out.  I asked Jer if he would go on a long, brisk walk with me and he of course was willing.  We set off on a 2.5 mile walk that I was hoping would at least cause some contractions.  There were a couple minor contractions but nothing like I was hoping for.  We got home and had a delicious Ribeye steak for dinner (I love that I married a man who likes to cook).  I was just settling in for the night when my friend Yvonne (who knew how much I wanted this baby out) called me and asked if I wanted to go for another walk.  I was really hoping to walk this baby out so I agreed and again we set off on another 2.5 mile walk.  There were really no contractions this time so I was extremely disappointed.  I had no contractions and I was now exhausted from walking my fat preggo self a total of 5 miles that day.

When I got home from my walk I decided to reward myself from all the walking with some delicious Fudge Sticks, a favorite during this pregnancy.  I got in some comfy PJ's called one of my closest friends, Katy, and snuggled in to have some girl talk while I devoured my Fudgy treat.  At 10:20pm Katy and I were just getting deep into the girl talk when suddenly I had a big contraction and what felt like the baby kicking downward with one leg with all his strength followed by a popping feeling inside.  (I realize he was head down at this point and it was not him that kicked me but it was just what it felt like, its hard to describe).  I was really enjoying my girl talk and fudgy goodness when this happened so I just chalked it up to a big contraction and continued on with my girly conversation.  I was really into the convo so I didn't want to leave it but when I felt a warm gush of water I figured my water had broke and I should probably take care of that.  I quickly told Katy what had happened and she excitedly wished me good luck and we hung up.  I ran to the bathroom and texted Jeremy who was downstairs and said "can you come upstairs, I'm pretty sure my water just broke"  he was upstairs with a panicked look on his face in about 3 seconds.  We quickly called Yvonne over to stay with Hadley since she was asleep and we rushed to the hospital.  I remember looking Jeremy in the eyes and just being so excited that we were about to meet our son!  I also remember Jeremy being so worried every time we hit a red light or even the tiniest bump in the road he would look at me with this concerned look on his face and say "I'm so sorry, Im so sorry, are you ok?"  his genuine concern was so endearing to me, it made me laugh and fall in love with him a little more simultaneously.

On the short 10min drive to the hospital my contractions were coming fast and hard and it was quickly becoming extremely painful.  I was already excited to get my epidural and was hoping they would get it to me quick.  We checked into the hospital about 10:45pm, and they must have been busy because the nurse (who was a pest control customer of ours...awkward) took FOREVER to check me.  I finally told her I was at a 4 this morning at my Dr. appt and asked "do you think you should check me"?  She replied "oh yeah if you were at a 4 we should probably do that" (In my head I was thinking 'seriously lady-I am ready for my drugs NOW').  When she finally checked me at about 11:15pm because I relentlessly kept asking about my epidural I was at a 8.  As soon as she said 8 I just knew there would be no epidural and she did too.  She still nicely tried to comfort me by telling me they would try to hurry and get things started but she and I both knew that it was not going to happen.  I was terrified.  Let me remind you my first baby was 9lbs 2oz and her head was in the 90th percentile so had a PTSD flash and I was really really really terrified of the pain that I knew was coming but at this point there was nothing I could do about it but wait...yikes.

After the news that I was at an 8 they quickly took me to the delivery room and called the on call Dr. to hurry down.  I remember with Hadley they were telling me that if I felt like my body needed to push to just let them know, I never felt that sensation with Hadley so when they told me that this time I sort of dismissed it thinking 'my body doesn't feel that'.  I was soooo wrong about that.  I started feeling that urge and the nurses telling me to just breathe through it and to do whatever I had to not to push until the Dr. arrived.  I remember sitting on the hospital bed holding Jeremy's hand and feeling unbearable pain but also laughing in my head at the really really weird sounds my body was uncontrollably making.  I wish I were joking when I tell you I sounded like a dying cow but I genuinly did.  I remember trying to stop making those crazy noises because I sounded ridiculous but as hard as I tried they just kept coming  without any warning.  I imagine those nurses were all talking and laughing in the halls together because I am almost certain the entire floor could hear my cow in labor noises.  I almost wish I had a recoding of it so you could hear it, but then again it was one of those embarrassing things you kind of want to pretend never happened.

Finally the Dr. arrived (Dr. Hernandez) and came in and told me it was time to push!  I was was first and foremost excited to finally be on the way to meeting the most handsome little boy in the world but a close second was that I was also going to be able to stop making that crazy noise and get this pain over with.

At 11:30pm I began pushing.  I am sitting here in tears as I think back on the pain I felt but more so how the pain was so quickly and easily overshadowed by the love I overwhelmingly felt as I brought my sweet little baby boy into this world.

The pain was pretty much as horrible as I thought it would be without an epidural.  After a couple of pushes I was making progress, but just as it happened with Hadley, he was stuck around my pelvic bone.  After having the stressful long delivery I had with Hadley concern and pressure immediately set in for me.  Something snapped in my head and I was consumed with fear that this delivery was going to go the same as my first.  With Hadley the Dr. kept coming in and telling me I needed a C-section because Hadley was so big and she was stuck saying there was no way I was going to get her out.  As soon as I heard the nurses say he was stuck, I immediately felt panicked.  I had to hurry and get him out or they were going to give me a C-section.  They moved me around to different positions and I pushed as strongly as my body would let me, but to me it still felt like it was not good enough and as the time passed I became more and more concerned that this was not going to happen naturally.  Finally one of the nurses got a bar that goes above your bed that you put your feet on and they tie a sheet to it.  They had me put my feet on the bar and hold onto and pull the sheet as I pushed.  Im sure it looked pretty strange but it was very effective and things began to progress quickly.

I remember looking into the light that was on the ceiling, it was just reflective enough that I could see the beginnings of his beautiful dark hair.  Soon after that I felt the worst burning feeling I have ever felt.  I had heard of this from other women that had also not had an epidural and they referred to it as the 'Ring of Fire'  I used to hear that phrase and just think of a classic Jonny Cash song, but now that phrase means something completely different to me.  It is a burning that you can not describe and its crazy painful but I knew it meant I was very close to finally holding and meeting my handsome son.  I only pushed for about an hour total but it all felt much longer than that.  I remember a strange feeling of my stomach collapsing and the pressure releasing as the Dr. delivered my sweet boy.  They quickly showed him to me and I could not believe what a big beautiful boy he was.  I immediately felt that strong sense of pride that my son was the cutest little baby boy there could ever be and I just wanted to snuggle him!  Jokes quickly filled the room of how big this boy was and bets were being made between the Dr. and nurses if he would be bigger than Hadley was.      

I couldn't see much as the nurses and Jeremy surrounded him when they placed him on the scale but I heard everyones shock and Jeremy told me "you are not going to believe it babe but he is 9lbs. 10oz. and 20.5"long.  Holy Moly thats a big baby.  As the nurses hurried to check everything on my sweet baby, and Dr. Hernandez worked quickly to give me my stitches I remember my sweet husband coming over to me and with pride in his tear filled eyes he held my hand and gave me a hug and kiss on my sweaty forehead and told me what a great job I did and how proud and thankful he was to me for giving him another sweet baby.  I cried through my puffy eyes and hugged him back thankful we were blessed with another healthy and amazing baby.

After a short time (that felt like hours) they brought my sweet boy over to me and layed him gently on my chest.  There is absolutly no way to describe the overwhelming love you feel when you get to hold one of your children for the first time.  I remember him blinking and looking at me for a short second before he fell asleep again snuggled on my chest.  I felt what I can only imagine The Grinch felt when his heart grew two sizes.  A wave of love spread through my entire body and I couldn't believe how much I already loved this sweet boy and how I felt like I already knew him.  My son.  I just wanted to snuggle him forever.  I finally agreed to give him to his Daddy so they could get me all taken care of.

When the Dr. got me all stitched up he came over to the side of my bed and kindly told me that I had done great and that everything looked good.  I remember trying to blink to see him because I could barely see and what I could see I was seeing double.  I thought it was just the tears in my eyes that were causing it and the fact that I was so tired.  I thanked the Dr. for his help, and they brought my sweet little/big guy back to me.  We snuggled skin to skin for a while and I fed him a little but he would not stop making little grunting and wheezing noises.  I knew he must be exhausted so I just snuggled him and hoped it would help him fall into a more restful sleep.  The nurse noticed his grunting noises and decided it was best to call up a nurse from NICU just to check on him because he could not seem to stop grunting and it had been about 2 hours.

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The NICU nurse arrived and after a short time being in the room with him made the decision that he needed to go down to the NICU unit because she felt there could still be some fluid in his lungs and she wanted to make sure everything was ok.  We asked for a moment alone before they took him down and the three of us stood there snuggled together as Jeremy gave our little baby boy a beautiful Fathers Blessing.  The nurse came back in and after answering lots of questions for us she assured us everything would be fine and she took my sweet little baby boy away from me.  I could not stop the tears and even though I knew everything would be fine I felt this horrible void from being separated from my baby.  I could not stop crying.  I knew everything would be ok but I could not stop the tears from coming and I knew I needed to distract myself until they called me and told me I could go be with my baby.

I cried until I felt like my body ran out of tears and decided I would take a second to wash my face, brush my teeth and just put myself together.  I waddled into the small bathroom and looked into the mirror.  What was staring back at me was unrecognizable.  I looked like I had been in an intense fist fight and punched in the face repeatedly.  My face was all puffy and my eyes were pretty much swollen shut.  I looked as though I had an allergic reaction to something.  The rest of my face was splotchy and red from crying so much.  You could hardly see my eyes and what you could see was a bloodshot bright red color.  I looked horror movie bad.  I had pushed so hard I popped blood vessels in both of my eyes.  My face was to say the least-disturbing.

I tried talking to Jeremy and just trying to rest after the delivery but I still could not shake that horrible void feeling.  I missed my baby.  My heart was aching and nothing could fix that until I got to hold my sweet little boy again.  We walked to the recovery room and I just sat there waiting mindlessly listening to the nurse and Jeremy.  I don't even remember anything that was said.  I just felt numb to everyone and everything.  I felt so lost.  I just wanted my baby boy.

After what seemed like possibly the longest few hours of my life around 3:30am they finally called and told me I could go down to NICU to be with my baby.  He was sleeping so peacefully when we arrived, just seeing him flooded me with life again.  The numb feeling left me as quickly as it had come and I finally felt whole again.  It was so heartbreaking to see my perfect little baby covered in wires and tubes but as soon as I held him on my chest the synchronization of our breathing seemed to make all of those wires disappear.  I never wanted to leave this moment.  It is one of those moments you want to bottle up and keep forever.  Having your new little baby snuggled up on your chest while you breathe in that wonderful newborn smell is as close to heaven as I think we can ever get here on this earth.

It was a long 3 days in the NICU.  I am very grateful for NICU nurses and their love and concern for my son, and even though the doctor and I disagreed on a few of the terms for being able to release my son from the hospital I am still so grateful for the knowledge and care the Dr's and nurses possess.  We slowly weaned him from the oxygen tube and on March 15th we were finally able to bring Colton home to meet his big sister.

It felt so good to finally be home all together.  Suddenly there we were a family of four.  Two of the worlds most beautiful children, and a mom and dad that love them so much they would do absolutely anything for them.

We are NEW MEXICANS

Well we finally did it, we moved to New Mexico to start our own pest control company.  It has been a long time coming.  We have been working toward this since we started working in the pest control industry about 6 years ago, and we are finally here.  We know there is still a long road ahead of us to get this company up and running, but we are excited to finally be on the way!  My brother, Wayne (who also lives in New Mexico, Yay!), has a saying "we are not New Mexi-CANT'S, we are New Mexi-CAN'S"!  I feel like that is our new motto as we get this company off the ground.  There is a lot of work and stress involved in owning/running your own company but Jeremy and I make a wonderful team and we are both willing to take on whatever comes our way as long as we stick together.

So far we are really enjoying our new hometown of Rio Rancho.  We have moved 10 times in the last 6 years and it feels REALLY good to know that we don't have to move again until we decide we want to move!  We are lucky enough to have my Brother and his family live only 10min away, and that has been a huge blessing.  They are a wonderful family, and Hadley is LOVING all the cousin time.  With all the moving around we have done we have really missed our family.  Wayne and Camille are so much fun and have also been a huge asset in starting the company, their knowledge and support have been a huge blessing, and I don't think we could do all of this without them (thanks guys we love you)!

Jeremy is more excited than ever to finally live in the same state he has residency in so that he can hunt at resident prices.  Every night he looks through the hunting proclamation for New Mexico and he is like a kid in a candy store, he can't wait to hunt everywhere/ everything NM has to offer!  He has also recently accepted a job guiding for elk in NM, it is his dream job and so far he is doing a wonderful job.  He has a great knowledge and love for hunting so it is great he can make money doing exactly what he loves to do (in the pest control off season anyway).  He also really loves being a dad and he and Hadley are hilarious to watch.  They have this silly bond and are always laughing and teasing one another.  Watching those two play together are my favorite moments of the day!

I am loving my full time job as a momma.  Hadley keeps me VERY busy but I enjoy every moment I have with her.  I feel very blessed to be a mom, especially to such a sweet and funny little girl.  I have also really started to enjoy a new hobby, photography.  I still have SO MUCH to learn, but it is something I really enjoy, and I look forward to bringing my camera everywhere.  Hadley on the other hand is already so sick of seeing my camera lens that she won't even look at it anymore.  She has been my little model on many occasions and I guess she is sick of all the photo shoots (its not my fault she is so stinkin cute)!  I am looking forward to working part time again for our company once we get started, but I am broken hearted at the thought of leaving my little girl while I am at work.  She makes me laugh so much everyday, and I am really going to miss all of those little moments throughout the day.

Hadley is running around like crazy.  She is BUSY BUSY BUSY!  She runs all over the house, and opens every drawer and cabinet in sight.  Needless to say her momma is very busy trying to keep up with her.  She is truly the light of our life.  She fills everyday with laughter and we can't get enough of her.  It seems like everyday we are exhausted from keeping up with her but as soon as we put her down for a nap we are counting down the minutes until she wakes up so we can play with her and let her entertain us again.  She is really becoming a soccer pro, and kicks her ball all around the house.  She and Duke are becoming best buddies.  She is constantly climbing all over him and stealing his bone from him and running away laughing.  Duke is Hadley's biggest fan, especially around meal time.  She very slyly sneaks him food under the table during every meal, and he thinks that is awesome!

We have had a lot of changes happen for our family in the last few months, but we are excited about all the changes so far and we are really looking forward to our bright future.  We are so grateful for such wonderful family and friends who are always there to help and support us as we move forward in this crazy thing we call life!!!

We love you all very much, and hope you have a Happy Holiday season!!!

Hadley's 1st Birthday!!!

She could not be any cuter!!!

I can't believe I have a 1 year old!!! Does this come as a shock to anyone else?  It seems like just yesterday Hadley was a tiny little newborn...

Hadley @ 3weeks

She is still pretty tiny weighing in at only 18.2 lbs. but she is now walking all over the place and keeping her momma VERY busy!  She started walking about 2 weeks before her birthday, and it is so cute how proud of herself she is every time she does it!  She is still a little wobbly but I am still a proud momma bear every time that girl takes a step!  She says a few words "Mama" "Dada" "Eyes" "All Done" "Hi Duke" "Hi" "Bye" and we are still working on a few more, but it amazes me how much she can learn in just one day, even things I had no idea she was aware of she will surprise me with pointing at it or looking directly at it when I say its name!  She is waving, blowing kisses, pointing to everything, and she is on the verge of dancing.  She does a lot of bouncing up and down when she is holding on to something and I know one day I will be watching her and she will just bust out some crazy dance moves and I am really looking forward to that!  I am obviously that first time mom that thinks every tiny thing she does is amazing, and honestly I am proud to be that mom, it is so much fun!!!  I am also that totally cheesy mom that thinks it is a NEED to celebrate all of Hadley's first holidays even though she has no clue what is going on.  Jeremy thinks I'm slightly crazy, but I just keep thinking one day she will look back at all these pictures of her first holidays and think "I guess my mom isn't SO bad".  

Hadley turned the big 1 on July 20th so naturally I felt the NEED to throw her a party.  We had her party on July 21st and since we don't know many people here in CA it was small but it turned out to be just perfect!!!  (I have to give a special shout out to my girl Sharon Hubbell who channeled her inner Martha Stewart and made most of the decorations!  Oh and did I mention that she drove over an hour just to come to this sweet girls birthday party, she is awesome and I am super lucky to have such a great lifetime friend.  Love you Shar!!!)

We had a small open house, opened presents and ate cupcakes (we would have had some delicious strawberry ice cream as well if I had remembered to get it out of the freezer to share with everyone....duh Stephanie) and did the cake smash moment.  All of the sales reps that we work with came to the party as well 2 of our awesome couple friends, the Hubbell's and the Morins, and their daughters, Amelia (3 months) and Kaia (8 months) these girls are Hadley's besties and they are both absolutely ADORABLE (who would have thought that a 1 year old girls birthday party would be mostly attended by single dudes haha)!!!  There were not any activities planned but I think everyone had a good time watching Hadley open presents and smash an entire cake (she honestly ate half of it before I finally had to stop her).  She was so funny all day and her silly personality had everyone laughing the entire time!!!  Here are a few pics of her fun day!!!  Thanks again to everyone that could come, Hadley is very lucky to have such awesome people in her life!!!

 I took a cake decorating class months ago just so I could make Hadley's first birthday cake/ cupcakes, and for a beginner, I think they turned out pretty good!

 Hadley kept teasing me and putting the cake right up to my face then pulling it away at the last moment, but she was more than happy to share cake with her daddy!  They are so cute!

Ummm.... by the looks of it, I would say she enjoyed her very first birthday!!!

Hadley has developed this adorable personality, and everyone that meets her instantly loves her.  

She already knows how to tease and flirt with boys to get what she wants, and it cracks me up every time.  For example if someone is eating something she wants a bite of she will slowly make her way over to them, giving them the flirty eyes and a smile the entire way, then softly lay her head next to them or on their lap and look up out of the corner of her eye and smile.  Needless to say it doesn't take much more than that before they have happily given up their entire treat to her.  She will never take food off of your plate or even point at it to get it, she will just flirt until she gets what she wants (smart girl)! 

She is constantly teasing people (mostly boys) with kisses.  When someone asks her for a kiss if she feels like being a tease (which is most of the time), she will go all the way in for the kiss with her lips ready until the very last second and then she will quickly turn her head away and smile and laugh.  We refer to it now as 'the take away', and she does it with everything (like the cake she kept teasing me with at her party) and thinks it is absolutely hilarious.  She still gets me every time she does it, and she is right it is hilarious that a 1 year old can tease people/boys so well already.  She is definitely an Eastman and we will definitely be in trouble with this one in a few years down the road!  

Hadley has become such a sweet and funny little girl, I feel so blessed and honored that my Heavenly Father trusted me with such an amazing daughter.  Everyday I am amazed at how much I love her, and how much fun she has become.  I look forward to all her birthdays in the years to come and every day in between!!!  We love you Hadley Bear, HAPPY FIRST BIRTHDAY!!!!

Hadley's Birth Story

I am finally getting around to sitting down and writing about one of the most amazing days of my life, Hadley's birth.  I should give fair warning that this is a LONG & detailed post.  So if you are not up for it just hit the back button now, but if you want to hear one of the greatest stories ever told (at least to me) then read on...

During my pregnancy I was CERTAIN that Hadley would arrive early.  I had it in my head that she would be here at least 3 weeks early...it just goes to show you that when you plan- God laughs.  I have always enjoyed working so I continued to work in the office throughout my pregnancy, and I was just waiting for the embarrassing moment when my water broke in my office chair.  My due date (July 13th) came and went.... and still no baby.   Everyone kept reassuring me that I had made such a wonderful home for her in the womb that she didn't want to come out, but I was getting so anxious, and I just wanted to hold my sweet baby.  My Doctor told me that she would let me go a week past my due date and then she would induce me.  I really didn't want to be induced, I wanted to go into labor naturally, but we tried a lot of 'old wives tales' and none seemed to help.

I went in for a doctors appointment on the 15th and I was really just hoping to show some progress.  I was hoping to at least be dilated to a 3, but I was still at a BIG FAT 0.  It was heartbreaking news, I just wanted to meet my little girl so badly.  The doctor, Jeremy and I discussed options.  I still wanted to wait and go into labor naturally but I had a couple of factors to consider.  My Doctor was going out of town on the 21st, and the hospital we were delivering at was known for being extremely busy, and often inductions that were scheduled were cancelled/postponed for weeks.  I heard horror stories of women going 3-4 weeks past their due date, and having to have C-Sections because the babies were so big.  Despite my desire to go into labor on my own, I was much more willing to get induced vs. the possibility of a C-Section.  Jer and I talked it over and we felt ok with the decision to be induced.  My doctor immediately called and tried to schedule an appointment, but the rumors were true and the hospital was booked for inductions and had no available appointments.  So there I was, still dilated to that big fat 0, just left to wait.

I went back to work with mixed emotions, happy I still had a chance to go into labor on my own, but sad that if I did not this baby might be HUGE, and I would be left delivering with a doctor I didn't know.  I remember being at work and my doctor calling me telling me the hospital had a spot open up on July 18th and she wanted to see if that would be an ok day for me, I excitedly and nervously told her yes!  I immediately called Jeremy.  He answered and the first thing I said was "So you wanna have a baby with me on Monday"?! He very calmly said "yeah sure".  I think he was at a loss for words (which is rare for him) and it was all starting to become real for both of us.  I hung up the phone and got lost in all my thoughts:  "am I ready for this", "I can't wait to hold her", "I wonder who she'll look like", "Can I handle all the pain of D-Day",  "I can't wait to kiss her cheeks"!  My mind was running a million miles an hour and I started to get really excited.  I went home and got everything packed and ready, and again I was left to wait...

The doctor had told me to call before I went in on Monday because the hospital was so busy, and they might cancel my appointment if it got busy enough.  We were supposed to go in around 7:00pm so I called around 6:30pm and of course they were booked, and said it would not work.  This roller coaster of emotions was starting to get to me, and being my emotional pregnant self, my eyes starting to well up with tears.  Fortunately the nurse on the phone looked over her schedule and told me to come in at midnight... needless to say I was relieved.  D-Day, as we referred to it at our house, was finally here.  I remember as I got closer and closer to my due date people would always ask me "so are you nervous?.  I always thought that was a silly question.  OF COURSE I'M NERVOUS, I am about to push a bowling ball out of me, wouldn't you be nervous?!  I don't know who in their right mind would not be nervous about giving birth for the first time.  I was not worried about the being a mommy part, but I was ridiculously nervous about the part where I had to push her out of me.  That is a big responsibly for anyone to take on.  You hear horror stories about huge babies, tearing, and emergency C-Sections everyday when you are pregnant so yeah people, of course I was nervous!!!

I knew I needed to calm my fears a little and I figured there was none better to rely on than my Heavenly Father and my amazing husband.  So I asked Jeremy to give me a blessing.  I remember sitting in my kitchen with his hands on my head and bawling my eyes out.  He gave me a beautiful, and much needed, blessing that put everything into perspective and calmed my nerves.  That was it, now everything was in place and it was time to go have a baby (yay)!!!    

We showed up at the hospital, and it looked like we were moving in.  I had packed EVERYTHING, and I am sure everyone was giggling as we passed them thinking "they must be 1st time parents".  They were right we really didn't use most of what we brought, but the one thing I was glad I brought was my own pillow (note to self: NEVER go to the hospital without your own pillow).  We were sent up to labor and delivery and as soon as we got there the nurse said "I was just about to call you to tell you not to come, we are booked".  I could not believe it.  I was heartbroken and the nurse must have seen it because she kindly said "since you are already here, we will make room for you, but it might be a while before we are able to start the induction".  I was 100% ok with that, as long as they didn't send me back home (I mean how many times can a girl prepare herself to have a baby).  We got settled in our room and I tried to get some sleep as I laid there waiting....

The nurse came into our room around 6:30am and began the process.  I can't remember all of what she did I just remember being so nervous about the pain that was coming, but also so excited to FINALLY meet my sweet baby girl.  The nurses kept coming in and checking to see if I had dilated, but as the HOURS passed I was still stuck at that dang ZERO.  It was starting to feel like this baby was going to stay in me forever (considering she is part Eastman and part Stansfield I should have known she would be stubborn and only willing to do things on her terms and timing!).  The contractions were coming and going and getting more and more painful.  I remember lying on my side shaking while clutching the side panel of the bed trying to 'breath through the pain' while "I Love Lucy" played in the background.  I looked over at my sweet husbands face and his eyes looked all watery.  He didn't know what to do to help and he had never seen me in so much pain.  I could tell he felt helpless, and as sweet as it was it still broke my heart to see him hurting for me.

Finally around 10:00pm a nurse came in and checked me and I had finally made some progress, I was at a 4!!!  It was finally happening, this baby was on her way!!!  I planned on trying to deliver without an epidural (again I am sure all the nurses were laughing when I said that, because they knew it would not last).  I feel like I put in a valiant effort, but it had been 12 hours since they started the process and the pain and fatigue were starting to get to me.  The nurses told me it would most likely still be quite a while before I started pushing since I was only at a 4.  I endured a while longer then talked to Jeremy and asked what his thoughts on an epidural were.  He had this to say "I don't understand why you ever wanted to do this without it, I say get the drugs".  That is my man, a straight shooter!!!  After much internal debate I began realizing that if I was going to get through this I would need some sleep that night and there was no way that was going to happen with these strong contractions, so I finally gave in and asked for the epidural.

Epidural = Bliss.  I could still feel and move my legs but the pain had washed away and I was left with a calming, tingling sensation in my legs.  Then finally I got some sleep (well as much sleep as you can get with monitors beeping, cords wrapped around you, and having your cervix being checked periodically).  The night was a blur of sleep and mixed emotions, until finally a nurse came in and checked me one last time.

It was around 3:00am and the nurse told me I was dilated to an 8.  Things were starting to happen.  She talked with me for a moment and was watching me with my contractions and said she wanted to check me again before she left.  She checked and then with some urgency said "you are there, (I was at a -2) this baby just took a swan dive, and we haven't called the doctor yet" (yep my little girl was doing things on her own time and she had just decided she wanted out...NOW).  She tilted my bed back so my feet were elevated to stop the progress until the doctor arrived (this is something I don't recommend, and will not let them do next time).  At some point during all of this I remember the nurse running to the door and yelling down the hall "we need help in here".  I am no expert when it comes to nursing but in the movies they only do that when something bad and urgent is going on.  My mind began racing thinking about all the things that could be wrong, and if my baby was ok.  I just kept picturing me holding my little girl, and for a quick moment I was scared that that was being taken away from me.  Fortunately my baby was fine, but in that moment everything became very real, very quickly.

Up to that moment I knew I was excited to be a mommy yet I still had so many nervous emotions, but when that nurse yelled down the hall and told me she was coming, my whole mindset changed.  It was like someone flipped a switch.  Suddenly I didn't even notice the pain, I wasn't worried about delivery, or being a mommy, all I could think about was my little girl and getting her here safely so I could hold those little fingers and kiss those little toes.  My mind revolved around her and everything I could do to get her here safely and finally have her join our family.

The doctor arrived around 3:15am and I began pushing.  I did everything I could do, I was using every ounce of strength I had in me, but it still did not seem to be enough.  There was very little progress, and it took me 45min of heavy pushing just to get me back to the -2 I had started at before they tilted my bed back (...which is why I don't recommend that).  My doctor had started to become very discouraging, and began to talk about a C-Section.  A C-Section was something I knew I didn't want, and to even hear those words made my heart sink.  Jeremy and I both looked at each other and we could read each others faces 'we cannot let that happen' is all we were both thinking.  We told her that we did not want a C-Section, and asked what we could do to avoid that.  The doctor said she would come back later and if there was still no progress she was ordering an emergency C-Section because this baby was way to big for my pelvis and there was NO WAY she was going to fit through.

When the doctor left the nurses (thank goodness for their faith in me) told me they thought I could do this without a C-Section but that her head was large and it was going to be extremely difficult.  I continued pushing as hard as I could.  I have never been so tired physically, emotionally and mentally, or worked so hard in my life.  Jeremy was very encouraging and was even involved in the delivery.  He was holding my leg and doing everything the nurses asked him to do.  He kept leaning down, kissing my forehead, and with tears in his eyes he kept telling me how proud he was of me.  He was the only thing keeping my spirits up when it seemed like all my work was in vein and the C-Section seemed inevitable.  The nurses and Jeremy kept saying they could see the hair on her head starting to come out with each push, but as soon as I would stop pushing it would go right back in.  I didn't know what else to do, I was honestly giving it everything I had but it still did not seem like enough.  I remember looking up at Jeremy with my eyes filled with tears and telling him "I don't think I can do this".  I was so scared of hurting Hadley because I was trying so hard to avoid a C-Section, but I didn't think the C-Section was the best choice for either of us.  My stress level was way passed a 10.  I was so conflicted and I didn't know what to do.

I continued pushing with all my heart, but when the doctor came back in she said there was still not enough progress and she didn't like the way the charts/monitoring were going for baby girl.  She left to arrange the C-Section.  My heart was broken, I felt horrible.  I honestly felt like a complete failure.  I had majorly let myself down, and worst of all I felt like I had let my husband and un-born daughter down.  All I could think about was this sweet baby and what she must be going through, and that there seemed to be nothing I could do to help.  Jeremy is the most incredible man on the planet, and he knew just what to do. With the doctor gone, he asked the nurses if they thought there was anyway I could still do this.  They looked at each other and I could tell they did not want to go against the doctors advice, but they said they still thought it was possible.  They told me again it would be difficult and now we had limited time to do this because the doctor had already ordered the C-Section, and the surgeon was on the way.

Jeremy calmly gave me a kiss on the forehead and said "keep pushing baby, I KNOW you can do this."  He calmly told me he was going to step away for a moment to say a prayer.  I watched him bow his head in the corner of the room and I knew we had to do this, and it had to be now.  Jeremy came back and I could see the faith and determination all over his face.  He grabbed my leg again and said "ok babe, you CAN do this, I know you can".  His strength and faith in me was refreshing, and gave me the motivation I needed to continue.  I remember feeling like there was still not much progress but I pushed and somehow, with an answer to his prayer, I pushed myself just high enough and for the first time I saw Hadley's head.  Once I saw her beautiful dark hair, I knew it was all going to be ok.  I knew I could do this, and I knew we were about to finally meet our perfect daughter.  With a renewed strength I pushed for a while longer and at 5:45am we met the love of our life.  Baby Girl Eastman had finally arrived.

 She did not cry right away and it concerned me for a quick moment.  I couldn't see anything in the room so I quickly turned to Jeremy and asked "is she ok, is everything ok"?  I have never seen such love on my husbands face.  Without taking his tear filled eyes off of baby girl he said everything was fine and they were just checking her over quickly, because of the long stressful labor.  After some encouragement we convinced Jeremy to cut the cord, then it was my turn.  In reality it was probably only about 1 minute before they gave her to me but it felt like hours!  I have never seen anything so beautiful.  I don't think there are any right words to describe this moment.  It was too beautiful to describe, but it is something I will never forget.  They laid her on my chest so we could have some 'skin to skin' time and she just snuggled right in and quickly fell asleep.  It was a long labor for both of us and she was exhausted.  I gently kissed her on her forehead and whispered "your finally here, I love you so much baby girl".  Jeremy wrapped his arms around both of us and gave us both kisses.  He kept thanking me for bringing this beautiful baby to our family, and telling me how proud he was of me.  I really don't think we have ever been happier.  She was perfect, and so beautiful.  I don't know how long we all stayed there cuddled together, but there has never been a moment so peaceful or full of joy as that one.

Hadley was 9.2 lbs and 21" long.  Her head was covered in thick dark hair just like her daddy, and she had a sweet little button nose, and big cheeks that were just made to kiss!  She was a big baby and it was a long labor.  She definitely did some damage to her momma upon her arrival, but I don't remember the pain during any of the labor.  They had cut off my epidural early because they were preparing for a C-Section so I could feel some or most of what was going on, but I was so focused on getting her here safely, and with all the stress that was going on, it was the last thing on my mind.  The recovery however was a very real and memorable pain, but my little Hadley Bear got here safely and if that was the price I had to pay to have that happen I would do it again a hundred million times over.  

I still cry thinking about this day.  It was such and incredible moment in my life.  I was blessed with a beautiful daughter that has brought me immeasurable joy, and the love/ faith, my husband had in me that day (and every day) is still amazing to me.  I know we were meant to be a family.  The three of us still snuggle like we did that day in the hospital bed, and daddy still frequently gives kisses to 'his girls', and thanks me often for bringing Hadley to our family.  We are all so lucky to have each other.  Each one of us needs/loves the other ones, and that is a beautiful thing.  It comforts me daily to know that whatever happens in this crazy life we will ALWAYS have each other, and we will ALWAYS be an eternal family.  We love this little girl more than we could have ever imagined, and we are so grateful that she, along with those big kissable cheeks of hers, joined our crazy little family!!! We love you Hadley Bear!!!

Well as all of you can see I am REALLY good at keeping my blog updated......or maybe not so much! I had pretty much all but forgotten that I had a blog when a friend told me I should start a blog, and then a distant memory of a blog I had created over a YEAR ago entered my mind, and I realized I should update at least once a year!

So here goes....

We left Houston in October, and although we really enjoyed our time and opportunities there, life took us elsewhere. We spent the winter in UT and loved every minute of it! It was so great to spend time close to family and friends, however even after 6 months of living there, I still wish we had more time with everyone there. I have to admit part of not seeing people as much as we would have liked to is my fault... shortly after we moved to UT (after secretly trying for quite a while) we finally got preggers!!! We are SO excited, but due to that stinkin first trimester, there were many months in UT I did not feel like doing a single thing!!!

We recently moved to Murrieta, CA (just north of San Diego) and so far we are LOVING it!!! We did not get to open our company this year, but we have high hopes and expectations to start the company winter 2011 or winter 2012, and we are really looking forward to that! We are in CA working for a wonderful pest control company and we are very happy here, Jer's sales are doing great, and I am loving the weather! We no longer have to deal with the snow in UT, or the crazy heat/humidity that Houston had to offer!!!

We moved here the very end of April, and we had a crazy couple of weeks.... We thought it would be fun to take Duke to the local dog park, seems like a good activity right?....WRONG! Duke managed to get fleas there, and just for the record-fleas are terrible, fortunately we work for a super cool pest control company that came out the very next day and eliminated our problem. So then I think everything is back to normal...WRONG again. I decided to take Duke out before we went to bed for the night and of course, being the curious dog he is, he found a skunk and managed to get sprayed right in the face. I don't know if any of you have ever encountered a direct skunk spray, but they spray an oil that sticks to EVERYTHING and it is miserable. The stench makes you choke and makes your eyes burn, not even joking. So we get him all washed up and our apartment smells terrible. I decide it would be a good idea to keep our windows and balcony doors open to air out the apt, good idea right? WRONG... at 4am I woke up to the burning eyes and miserable choking smell. The skunk again found its way onto our balcony, got stuck there, and sprayed directly through the screen door into our bedroom!!! Who gets sprayed by a skunk 2 nights in a row?? By now my prego, hormonal, tired, overwhelmed self melts down. I went into the bathroom to bathe Duke, again, and I just started crying. Fortunately I married the most amazing, caring man in the world. Jer came in and saw me and gave me a hug told me to go into the living room and he would take care of everything, so that is exactly what I did. He is incredible! I smelled like rotten skunk for days, and I was the joke of the office for quite a while. It has been a couple of weeks and our bedroom and dukes face still have a slight odor, but the smell FINALLY seems to be going away!! Yay!! There were many more small things that happened that week, but things are finally returning to normal and we are SO grateful for that, because we are quickly approaching our due date, and I need to be sane by then!!

Our due date is July 13th, and Jer and I are basically peeing our pants with excitement (or maybe its cause this kid thinks my bladder is a trampoline) we are really looking forward to the day we get to see "baby girl's" BEAUTIFUL face!!! We are so happy to finally be starting this part of our lives, but neither one of us can believe we are old enough to be having a kid, we still like to think we are 16 & 17, but that is FAR from true (jer's grey hairs can prove it, haha)!!

As excited as we are there still seems to be so much to do, and trying to deal with this crazy health care system when you are un-insured is like a full time job!!! I think we are finally getting everything figured out though, so hopefully we can just start enjoying all this pregnancy stuff! Between moving, job changes, and skunks things have been crazy. It seems like we have not had much time to just enjoy being pregnant. Although now that I think about it there is not much to enjoy about being pregnant (unless you enjoy getting up 3 times a night to go to the bathroom, or getting kicked in the ribs all day long!). However it all becomes worth it when Jer gets to feel her move and his face lights up with excitement, or when I remind him of how little time we have left before 'D-Day' and I get to see his shocked face, it is PRICELESS, and so funny!!

Jer is really funny with my belly. I told him the baby can hear him and he should talk to her so she recognizes his voice so he talks to my belly but for some reason he will never talk in a normal voice he is always doing some crazy loud voice or accent, its really funny, but this poor girl must already think her dad is crazy!! Before we go to bed every night Jer is very sweet and rubs my big ol' belly for a minute but then his fun personality kicks in and he can't even help himself he has to blow raspberries on my belly, then yells into my popped out belly button "Can you hear that baby"!! He is so funny with me/her, I seriously love him a ridiculous amount!!! He has been very sweet through this whole pregnancy (even if he laughs at me every time I have to rock back and forth just to get the momentum to stand up with this HUGE bump) he is always offering to help me or do things for me to make me more comfortable. He is going to be a great "Biggy Papa" (that has become his nickname in our house). I am really looking forward to watching him interact with her. He acts like a big macho tough guy, but those that really know him know he melts like butter when it comes to me and this little girl!!!

We are so excited with where life has taken us, we feel like we are building a wonderful future, and we honestly enjoy every day we have together. We are so happy together, and we would not change a minute of our CRAZY life!!!

I am jumping on the bandwagon. I started a blog. I thought it might be nice for friends and family to see what Jer and I are up to, since we move at least twice a year, and travel in between, its hard to stay in touch. I have to admit I considered naming the blog "modern day gypsies" since that is the nickname we have adopted over the past few years!



We are in Houston now, and we are loving every minute of it!!! The weather is amazing(much better than the snow everyone continues to face in Utah). We are glad to be in the warm sun at the pool, while most of our friends, and family, are still shivering in their winter boots! Duke(our dog that is treated like our own child) is loving Texas as well. He is very excited to have some grass to run in, versus the landscape rock Arizona had to offer. There is a dog park here with an agility track, a large pond, a jumping dock, and everything a dog could dream of! Duke knows exactly where we're going, even when we are still a mile away, he LOVES it!!





We are really looking forward to the future and starting our own company. I think Jeremy is excited for the business end of things (and the fact that he gets to officially be 'the boss') while I am excited to move somewhere and stay put for at least a full year! We have really enjoyed living in all the places we have. We have learned a lot about life, and a lot about what we want out of life. I would not have done it any other way, however I am glad this constant moving around is coming to a close. Our plan is to open our own company, in New Mexico, in the year of 2011! (Look out Wayne and Camille, the Eastman Clan is coming to stir up some trouble on your side of town!)





We are very grateful to all of our friends and family for helping us to get to where we are today. We have been extremely blessed with the love and support, of those closest to us. Each of you has offered us something that we cannot put a price tag on. We are so excited with where we are in life!!! When I married Jeremy I knew I was in for a life full of fun and love, but I had no idea how much fun it would really be. We have a life so full of joy and excitement, and we owe that to those of you who helped to shape us into the people we are today. So thank you.



Well that is it folks. My first official 'blog', I will keep you updated on our next adventure!